The Jamer League
by MisterMonkeyKing
Summary: The 6 newly discovered heroes of the team of The Jamer League of America travel on many adventures! Or should I say Misadventures..., Join the new heroes such as the Telekinetic Illusion master "Poltergeist!", the Shape-shifting and Earth protecting "Force Of Nature!", The super speedy comic geek "Slow-Poke!", The high flying guy with the swagger "Altidude!", Oh and Fuzzy Eye-ris..


The Marvel universe, A land of Heroes such as Captain America, Thor, Iron Man, and the HULK! However, this tale will not be about your Grandmothers heroes, NO SIR! This tale will be about an extremely...uhhhh..."Unique" band of misfits, OH I MEAN HEROES! Yes,...heroes..(God who the hell wrote this!?...Oh...yeah...)

*Somewhere on the Helicarrier* Nick Fury: GOD! WHERE THE HELL ARE THE AVENGERS!?

Captain America: Right here sir and we have the new recruits!

Nick Fury: Welcome my fine-ass children! NOW HOW ARE YOU TODAY!?

Children: Uhhh-

Nick Fury: SHUT THE FUCK UP WHEN ADULTS ARE FUCKING TALKING YOU PRE-PUBESCENT LITTLE SHITS!

Children: Yes sir..., I think?

Nick Fury: Now, YOU ALL SHOULD KNOW WHY YOU ARE EACH HERE, RIGHT!?

Children:Because our parents dont like us for having powers...So they sent us here...

Nick Fury: HELL YEAH THEY DONT LOVE YOU! I WOULD ALSO THROW YOU AWAY IF YOU CAME OUT OF MY VAGINA!

Jason (Youngest of the kids and most perverted, age 15) :PFFT, Wait what!? HAHAHA!

Nick Fury: MAN! SHUT THE FUCK UUUUUP! IN MY DAY, WE WERE ALL HERMAPHRODITES!

Mik (name rhymes with stick, and 2nd oldest age 16 and most thug life): YEAH DUMBASS! LISTEN TO THE BITCH WITH THE FUCKING EYE PATCH!

Nick Fury: THANK YOU DUMBASS! HEY BLACK WIDOW, GET BACK IN THE KITCHEN AND MAKE THIS DUMBASS A SANDWICH!

Captain America: Uhhh sir, she is not here today...

Nick Fury:WELL THEN! YOU ARE THE CLOSEST THING TO A GIRL WE HAVE HERE! WHY DONT YOU DO IT! WOMAN!

Captain America: Uhhh, yes sir...

Iris (Only female out of the bunch, and 2nd youngest and gets mad easily) : You know, im also a lady! And ever heard of women's rights...

Nick Fury: YOU ARE NOT A WOMEN! *points to one of the kids* THAT IS A WOMEN!

Bernard (Oldest, age 16, and obsessed with comics): Hey, im not a women, *Snaps fingers and bob's head*

Nick Fury: AND YOU! WHAT IS WITH THAT HOBO ASS HAIR!

Joshua (3rd oldest and 3rd youngest, searches under bed for cryptids): Not sure if you mean Hobo-Ass hair or Hobo Ass-Hair...

Nick Fury: AND YOU! I really dont have anything to say about you...

Ricardo (Not much is known about him, not even his age or date of birth):...Hm, yeah im alright!

Nick Fury: NOW THAT WE ALL KNOW EACH OTHER! DEMONSTRATE YOUR POWERS ON THIS DUMBASS!

Captain America:Who me? Uh, no no no no...

Nick Fury: ITS YOUR TIME TO SHINE GIRLY!

Iris: Yes! Ive been waiting for this! *gets in fighting stance*

Nick Fury: NOT YOU MANLY! IM TALKING TO GIRLY OVER THERE! *points at Bernard*

Bernard: Im not girly! Buuut, this was the main focus of coming here! *stands in front of Captain America*

Captain America: Uhhh, am I supposed to hit him? *All:Yes!* Well then okay..., *Hits but then, Bernard dodges it with super speed while dodging everything Captain America hits him with, then Bernard jumps up and says*

Bernard:I LEARNED THIS ONE FROM A VIDEO GAME! * Then preforms a Homing attack from a video game about a certain blue hedgehog*

Captain America: Ahh! My stomach!

Nick Fury: OKAY, YOUR TURN MANLY!

Iris: Okay...*Vanishes*

All:WAAAAAAAAAA-

*Re-appears behind Captain America struggling to get up*

Captain America:I GOTTA GET OUT OF HERE! *Goes behind a wall*

Iris: *Eyes glow red* There you are *Pulls Captain America out of the wall, and choke slams him to the ground*

Captain America: NO MORE!

Nick Fury: OKAY! TIME TO PUT THAT ONE DUMBASS IN THE FIGHT!

Captain America: Oh no you dont! * Throws shield and cuts of Mik's arm*

All: *GASP!*

Jason: ...yay...

Mik: Hmmm...*Regenerates arm*

Captain America: Waaaa-

Mik: *pulls out a Glock-Pistol* Thug life bitch! *Shoots Captain America through the stomach*

Captain America: WHYYYYY?

Mik: *Walk's toward cap and touches his scars and heals them*

Captain America: Thank you, just tha-

Mik:*Points gun* BITCH!

Nick Fury: Your turn JACKASS!

Jason: AWWWW YEAHHH! * Levitates and Immobilizes Captain America* ITS TIME TO SCREAM! COME ON! SCREAM FOR ME!

Captain America: NO!

Jason: *Flicks Fingers, and creates the Illusion of Ghosts*

Captain America: IM NOT AFRAID OF GHOSTS!

Jason: Okay...*Levitates Books and throws each one into his crotch*

Captain America: *Tears rolling down his cheeks* AHHHHHH!

Jason: Yay!

ALL: WTF WAS THAT! YOU WANTED HIM TO SCREAM BY SHOVING THINGS INTO HIS BALLS!? WHAT IS THIS A PORNO?

Jason: Can I answer that?... Cuz life is a porno...

Nick Fury: ANYWAYS! GO ON, HOBO HAIR KID!

Joshua: Hmmm, I wonder what to do...Maybe...Oh! I should probably fight!

Captain America: NO SHIT SHERLOCK! *throws shield*

Joshua: *Turns into a dragon-fly and dodges*

Captain America: DAMMIT, NOW IM DISARMED!

Joshua:*Turns into a goat to am him in the air, then came back down to see that Joshua turned into a gorilla, Joshua grabbed him and threw him onto the floor*

Joshua: SKREEEEEEEEEEONK!

Nick Fury: NOW ITS YOUR TURN KID THAT ACTUALLY MATTERS TO ME!

Ricardo:Aw yeah, it's me time!

Captain America: NO! IM TAKING A VACATION!

Ricardo: *Flies up, grabs Cap by the feet and throws him out the window* Have a nice vacation!

Nick Fury: NOW THAT YOU RETARDS PASSED THE FUCKING INITIATION! ITS TIME TO GET YOUR SUPAH SUITS AND NAMES!

Jason: Woman, where is mah SUPAH SUIT!?

Nick Fury: RIGHT HERE! "Poltergeist" *The suit was a Grey jacket, sweat pants and sneakers with purple tassels, and a purple bandanna that doubled as a hood.

Poltergeist: Wow this is pretty coo- WAHH! MY NAME CHANGED! - THAT IS TOO COOL!

Joshua: Wow! Me next! Me next!

Nick Fury: Here you go, "Force Of Nature" *The suit was Green in both pants, Shirt and shoes, but it had yellow stripes and a Mask with pointy ears and showed Joshua's hair on the top*

Force of Nature: Huh, the name is kinda cool,but why is there a yellow silhouette of a meerkat's head as my logo?

Nick Fury: Next is Iris, or should I say...Eye-ris *The suit was Red, from the boots to the Mask that covered her entire head except her mouth, eyes, and the back of her head, also there were upside-down Eyes on her forehead, elbow's and knees, and one big one on her abdomen*

Eye-ris: Seriously, "EYE-RIS!?" Well, the suit is kinda well done, but you are still going to die tonight.

Nick Fury: Next, Bernard, or should I say the Ironically named "Slow-Poke" *The suit was orange and metallic, unlike the others this one had a Helmet and not a mask, the helmet had wings on it similar to Hermes, and Wheels on the shoes so they can help drift and wall-run*

Slow-Poke: Wow! I actually love this suit! The name is kinda weird, but I dont care!

Nick Fury:Next on the list! Ricardo! Your name is Altidude!* This suit was blue, it had a dark blue cape, and a cyan Albatross logo, and Golden goggles that he mostly wore on his head, rather then his eyes*

Altidude: Well! From my suit to my name! I got the swagger!

Nick Fury: Finally we have Mik as...FLUFFY BUNNY! *His suit was Pink, it had bunny ears, a cotton tail, and big feet, also It had a plastic mask that covered his face, the mask was a Halloween mask for a human skull, but caved the teeth to looked like bucked teeth*

Fuzzy Bunny:...I DONT EVEN!

Nick Fury: Okay retards, and fucking questions?!

Fuzzy Bunny: WHAT IS ALL...THIS!?

Nick Furry: It was the only suit we had left that could regenerate like you , cant see why nobody chose it...

Force of Nature: Yeah, does my suit rip if I turn into anything huge?

Nick Fury: No, it is made on an elastic type material but it is much more, it has information of every recorded animal alive today, so each animal you turn into has its own custom suit for the species that the suit can transform into, for example turning into a snake will allow the suit to become smaller and longer, and the sleeves will fold into the suit.

Slow-poke: Um, yeah... WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY EYES!

Nick Fury: Oh, whenever you put on the helmet, your eyes become White and they start glowing.

Slow-poke: Cool!

Nick Fury: OKAY ALL OF YOU MAGGOT!*presses button* YOU WILL GET YOUR OWN MINI-HELICARRIER!*The Mini-Helicarrier rose up, it was as long as a diplodocus, and was as wide as the length of a house*

Nick Furry: Because I said so! Your name will be based off of the Justice League because D.C is fictional and Marvel is real because WE ARE IN MANHATTAN!

Ricardo: So if our names are based off of the Justice League, then what is our name?

Nick Fury:THE JAMER LEAGUE!

And so, the Misadventures of the Jamer League of America begins here! What will happen to our brave Super Crew known as "The Jamers" TILL NEXT TIME! ON Jamer League!

* * *

Yo Yo, whats up guys, its your boy JoeJoetheBro here! And welcome to the first Chapter of my new on going series! The idea was made while I was having a conversation with Lord Giratina while on Facebook, at first it was just an in-side joke, but then it somehow turned into a chapter on fanfic, so as always guys, Make Love not Babies!


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